Okay, so I've got something on my mind, and I don't know, I think it's a little too personal to put out there. But I'll give it my best shot:
LOVE. What is there to say about love? When do you feel it? What does it feel like? What age should you feel it at?
I personally don't think there's a certain age where you can say, "Okay, I'm this age now, so I can know what love feels like." That's bullshit. You feel it when you feel it. Granted, lots of the younger teenagers say they're in love with their significant other, when it's really just infatuation. I do think they are too young to know what true love feels like, but it's different for all of us. For me, true love is that endless, compassionate, selfless love that you feel for another person. Ask a teenager who is "in love" and most likely, they won't be willing to be compassionate or selfless, and you'll find that it's just infatuation.
You start to experience true love when you're older because you're more mature and have experienced things in your life that shape you into the person that you are. You know what you want and don't want out of life. And you are more willing to sacrifice for someone that you really care about....
....The reason why I'm bringing this up is because (and this is the embarrassing part) I met someone about three years ago. I have always been extremely attracted to him ( haha, yes it is a him) but I never really did anything about it, because I was always here in Costa and I figured "Why bother, I'm leaving in a few weeks and I'll probably never see him again." Then he came to my house back home and I thought the same thing. And time went by, and I slowly started to forget about him and move on, even though he was still in the back of my mind. Then the day before yesterday, my dad tells me we're gonna go visit him and his family on Wednesday.
I was all excited and giddy for a while, but then I realized that I had to calm down. He probably had a girlfriend, he doesn't like me anyway, blah blah blah. So by the time we got to his house I was pretty calm and collected. And then I saw him...
.....Holy Shittttt. All those feelings just came flooding back like that. And I couldn't figure out what to do with myself. So the point I'm trying to get at is that for the longest time, I swore I was in love with this guy. But then I realized I hardly knew him. And I didn't meet up to my own standards of what love is. So for now, I'll call it infatuation. But I've never been this infatuated in my life haha. Any advice?
Song of the day: Heaven- Moonpools & Caterpillars
Until next time
Sary
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