Ticquisia

No one commented on that last entry where I freaking spilled my guts out to everyone. This is disappointing.

Anyways, Im here (cant find the apostrophe yet so bare with me). Im still too attached to California to call this place home. I think when that day comes it will be a sad day in my life. I know I said I would write two days ago, but it was about the unluckiest day of my life and I was seriously not in the mood to write. And I dont care to retell it right about now so back off.

To make a long story short, adjusting to Costa Rica is going to be a lot tougher than I thought. I miss Chris and Casey so so so much. And its weird because usually when things get tough I just give up. But I cant just quit on this one. I either get used to it or I get used to it. And there is some sadness in that, some nostalgia. Im just really depressed for lack of a better word. I know its only my fourth day here, but I cant see myself living comfortably here for a very long time yet to come.

When it comes down to it, I want to go home. I want to see my best friends.

But that cant happen. Atleast not for now. So I just have to deal with it and move on. I guess this is what being an adult means. People think the transition from kid to grown up is slow and transitive, but thats all bullshit. It just happens from one day to another and bites you in the ass, and then you have to deal with hardships that you have no idea how to handle.

So I know I said that my entries were going to be more philosophical but I think its okay for now to just get my feelings out. Plus, dealing with change in itself is a philosophical concept isnt it? Come to think of it, here is my question for the day.

What drives and motivates you to step out of your comfort zone? How do you deal with change and fear of the unkown?

Talk to me.

Song of the day (insert GODDAMN colon) Lovesong of the Buzzard- Iron and Wine

Until next time
Sary

p.s. that song reminds me of my aquarium adventure with Casey. Awww.